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Read & Weep

Too Late

I was never so popular in my building as when I was moving out. Outside of the homeowner meetings I chaired, my conversations with 80 percent of my neighbors was limited to answering their questions about

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First-World Problems

It’s been one week and two days since David and I officially moved. I use the word “officially,” because there are still some odds and ends that need transporting. I haven’t been back to the old

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“I’d Love It.”

  I’m feeling magnanimous today, so I’m going to give a free word of advice to fledgling information peddlers and fund raisers. Okay, so it’s not actually a word — it’s an acronym, and one that

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Please Explain

It’s my belief that it’s only polite to affix an explanatory license plate holder around an ambiguous license plate. If I can’t decipher your jumbled, vowel-free catchphrase at a glance, your money has been wasted. In

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Buff Bandits

When I saw “Card Services” on the Caller ID, I assumed spending money on the other side of the country had spooked one of my credit card accounts into thinking there was a possible fraud. When

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Last and First

The deed is done. Last night David and I slept in our new home for the first time. We have moved the bulk of our things from the Egyptian (the name of our old condo building) to Pandorica (the nickname

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Just Like Dad

It’s a common question: “What’s your dad do?” It’s natural for people to inquire after another’s parents, to gather information to assist in making those assessments of others that are in our nature to make. It’s

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OMG Adorbz

As with most people who hover over a computer for hours on end, I have my visual vices. Unlike dudes, who probably go straight to the porn sites (I’m not saying I don’t, just that it’s

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Worst Dressed

“Oh, boy, guess what!” Robert called from his living room throne, a modern recliner on which he is stationed much of the time. Ency, David, and I were in the next room, hunching over a thousand-piece

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Facial Party

The story is as old as Avon. A salesperson slips into your social sphere, and the “social” invitations follow. But these aren’t casual, gather-round-the-teapot chatter fests – they’re nets cast far and wide, for the sole purpose

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