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Diary of a Diva

Craic Addicts

Craic (crack) — a term for fun, entertainment, and enjoyable conversation, particularly prominent in Ireland. After suggesting we all meet at around 8 or 8:30 for breakfast, Dad confirmed the rendezvous for 8:15. His decision to

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One Terrific Pig

How about “Pig Supreme?” asked one of the lambs. “No good,” said Charlotte. “It sounds like a rich dessert.” — E. B. White When my friend Sara announced the impending arrival of her new pet —

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Party Patrol

I’m anal retentive. I’m a workaholic. I have insomnia. And I’m a control freak. That’s why I’m not married. Who could stand me? — Madonna Few things get past me at parties. I am a multitasking

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No Better Feeling

Oh, the summer night/ Has a smile of light/ And she sits on a sapphire throne. — Barry Cornwall It had been a lackluster evening. Our waiter was unnaturally perky. The bare-wood acoustics made for stunted

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Seismic Sensation

We learn geology the morning after the earthquake. — Ralph Waldo Emerson I felt the tremor in my feet before I heard the familiar groan in the walls — my home bracing itself for a shake. Pre-tremble creak

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Guilty Pleasure

Show me a woman who doesn’t feel guilty and I’ll show you a man. — Erica Jong The phone rang. I grabbed the receiver, glanced across the counter at David, and said, “Two guesses.” “Don’t need

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Suburban Dream

Towered cities please us then,/ And the busy hum of men. — John Milton The flags marked the transition from one kingdom to the next. I knew the meaning of all the colors and symbols in

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Bubble o’ Trouble

Driving a brand-new car feels like driving around in an open billfold with the dollars flapping by your ears as they fly out the window. — Grey Livingston I led the uniformed man around the hood

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The Chat Locker

On this shrunken globe, men can no longer live as strangers. — Adlai E. Stevenson People think time is fixed, an immutable truth like the laws of mass and energy. They’re wrong. Seven days of vacation

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Raising the Bar

Why don’t you slip out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini? — Robert Benchley Cocktail at Death & Co. “M and H. This must be it,” I said, stopping before an unlit gray

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