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Blog Archives

40 Year Old Version

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter. — Mark Twain I positioned the necklace on the table — novelty beads flaunting the number “40” with a glittery pendant

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Wine Snobs

Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent. — Eleanor Roosevelt David swirled the wine in his oversized glass and brought it to his nose. After an exaggerated sniff, he said, “I’m getting a bouquet

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Fromness

To me, it seems a dreadful indignity to have a soul controlled by geography. — George Santayana ‘Where are you from?” It was a simple question. But the way Jane stared back at the guy, you’d

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Playpendemonium

The secret of dealing successfully with a child is not to be its parent. — Mell Lazarus Had it not been for the unmistakable racket of a wailing child and the desperate, hushed tone of a

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Junk Talk

What’s the big mystery? It’s my vagina, not the sphinx! — Miranda on Sex and the City We were at Target, a store Jane hits up an average of three times a week. While Jane and I

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Family Practice

As the lily among thorns, so is my love among the daughters. — Solomon Ibn Gabirol I waited in the lobby and watched through the window as the cold rain pelted the sidewalk. I nodded in

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Do Right

I dug right down to the bottom of my soul… And cried. ’Cause I felt…nothing.— A Chorus Line “Your phone is ringing,” David said. “It’s your mom. Here.” Disoriented, I took hold of the small glowing

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Lollipop Guild

Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. — George Bernard Shaw Bella was the first to notice me. She waved one hand high above her head and used the other to

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Twisted Sister

If you don’t understand how a woman could both love her sister dearly and want to wring her neck at the same time, then you were probably an only child. — Linda Sunshine Jenny was right

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Native Toungue

One way to prevent conversation from being boring is to say the wrong thing. — Frank Sheed ‘How do you say, ‘Your mother is a toad’?” I said, lifting my pen in expectation. “I don’t understand,”

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